If there were a cartoon that brought the Seat Altea to life as a character, it would hate the Honda Jazz. Because the Honda is always being called clever, and gets to hang out in the cool car parks, with Volkswagen Tourans and Mercedes B-Classses, while the Alteas are left to squeeze into a road side space next to weedy little Vauxhall Merivas.
For my money though, the Altea is a clever car. It looks not just like a small MPV such as the Renault Scenic, but a tiny MPV like the Meriva. Yet, when you sit in the back, even as an adult there is leg and head room to shame large family hatchbacks and saloons. When you sit in the front, you don’t feel like you are riding up the front of a small lorry, as in Tourans, but like you are in a hatchback. And in the case of the 2.0 TDI Sport spec test car, a hot hatchback.
So in this animated Hollywood classic that has yet to be commissioned, the ambitious Altea will challenge the more acclaimed brands to a series of dramatic challenges. Starting somewhere miserable like Brent Cross car park, 2.4 children and a week’s shopping will have to be consumed, including some fragile comestibles. The bigger Tourans and Scenics won’t have a problem taking the luggage, but with no actual boot area, eggs will soon be rolling in aisles and orange juice cartons sliding out of the carrier bags.
The Honda Jazz, Mercedes B-Class and Seat Altea, with actual boots will be loaded quicker and head off for the centre of town knowing that their loads will stay put. This handy little group will need to change lanes a lot if they are going to get through the traffic quickly, and even if they don’t try to make progress, the hilarious Swiss Cottage junction, with its many lanes and exits merging requires good visibility, nimble handling and a bit of power. Anything fat or slow, like the bigger MPVs will soon have aggressive commuters and locals peeping and tooting in disgust. It is here that the narrow Altea starts to pull out its lead and the kids in the back may even turn off their DVD player that has been folded down from the ceiling and start to cheer.
As the little cars burst on to the outer circle at Regents Park for a mad dash around the pretty red roads, it will be clear to all that the Altea is rather like a go-kart, with the most power (easily developing wheel spin on any remotely uneven road surface), the best handling and the lowest seating position.
But alas, when they all pull up in St Johns Wood to park, the Seat brand just doesn’t quite have the gravitas to turn heads. So the Altea’s accomplishments go un-noticed and under reported, which is why my cartoon will never be made. Because cartoons have happy and just endings, where as car sales just have inexplicable sales trends.
What’s the market like?
There are 5,000 or so Alteas in the used car market at present, almost equally split into petrol and diesel.
The best used buy is either the 2.0 petrol or 2.0 diesel depending on your stand point. They are both more powerful than the 1.9 TDi which makes them seem more capable, refined and fun. But are roughly the same money.
The petrol manages 15 mpg less than the 1.9Tdi but has much lower average mileage, whereas the 2.0 Tdi has the highest average mileage of all but gets to within 3 mpg of the 1.9.
Interestingly this is one of a relatively small number of cars that shows little difference in depreciation pattern between the petrol and the diesel engines. Which means that whether buying new or used, the diesel probably makes more sense on cars under 5 years old. Although as you will see in the price pages, the mileages of the petrols are typically lower. So while the petrol bill may be higher than the diesel, repair costs may be lower, especially on older cars; diesels are often more expensive to repair and the higher the mileage the more likely a break down is.
So the choice is to trade day-to-day economy against repair bills and value for money in terms of car condition.
What else can this budget buy?
The Volkswagen Touran is extremely similar money to the Altea, right the way through from nearly new to 5 year old cars. The Touran makes you look more successful, or more dusty (depending on what borough live in I guess). The Touran also feels more like a big MPV whereas the Altea feels more like a hatchback to drive.
If you want a more genuine small MPV experience, you could look at a Vauxhall Meriva which is £2-3,000 cheaper, which fairly represents the driving experience, but rather under values the Vauxhalls no-nonsense practicality.
Or you could have the Renault Scenic which sits rather nicely between these two extremes. Bigger and better than the Vauxhall, similar in ownership experience to the Touran, but again to reflect the less enjoyable drive compared to the Altea, it is still £1,000 or so less.
Summary
It may look like a dull, tiny MPV for sad families. But with the right engine it is a thrilling little go-kart while also managing to be refined and totally practical. It is a real all-rounder which deserves more attention.